How to break up with “should” in your career | Julia Korn | TEDxApex

Updated: November 20, 2024

TEDx Talks


Summary

The video delves into the speaker's journey of overcoming a toxic relationship characterized by societal pressures and 'shoulds.' They reflect on the negative impact of external expectations on decision-making and well-being, leading to misalignment burnout. The speaker challenges conventional career advice, advocating for self-reflection and breaking free from maladaptive 'shoulds' to pursue paths aligned with personal desires rather than societal norms.


Dumping Toxic Ex

The speaker discusses their experience of finally ending a toxic relationship that was causing them distress and impacting their well-being.

Toxic Relationship with Should

The speaker reflects on their toxic relationship with the concept of 'should,' highlighting its negative impact on their life and decision-making.

Pursuing External Expectations

The speaker shares their journey of pursuing careers and paths based on external expectations and societal norms rather than personal desires.

Misalignment Burnout

The speaker describes experiencing misalignment burnout, where they found themselves in situations that did not align with their true selves, leading to a sense of loss and confusion.

Impact of Early Pressures

The speaker explores the impact of early societal pressures and expectations on career choices and the narrowing of career prospects for young people.

Follow Your Passion Debate

The speaker challenges the notion of 'follow your passion' as career advice, suggesting that it may not be practical or realistic for everyone, especially at a young age.

Breaking Free from Should

The speaker encourages breaking free from 'should' by differentiating between good shoulds and maladaptive shoulds, emphasizing the importance of self-reflection and breaking away from societal expectations.


FAQ

Q: What is the concept of 'should' as described in the file?

A: 'Should' refers to the external expectations and societal norms that influence decision-making, leading to pursuing paths not aligned with personal desires.

Q: What is misalignment burnout as mentioned in the file?

A: Misalignment burnout is the feeling of being in situations that do not align with one's true self, causing a sense of loss and confusion.

Q: How does societal pressure impact career choices according to the file?

A: Societal pressure can lead young people to make career decisions based on external expectations, limiting their career prospects and causing stress.

Q: Why does the speaker challenge the advice of 'follow your passion'?

A: The speaker challenges 'follow your passion' as career advice because it may not be practical or realistic for everyone, especially at a young age.

Q: What is the importance of breaking free from 'should' according to the file?

A: Breaking free from 'should' involves differentiating between healthy societal expectations and harmful ones, emphasizing self-reflection and personal autonomy.

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